Here’s my take on the topic regarding the title above:
1. “You can come along (on our date), too…”
What the HELL?! I am not a freaking third wheel. Please, don’t feel sorry for me.
2. “What do you think he/she would think of this [insert ridiculous present here]?”
Do I look like a mind reader? You’re the one seeing him/her 24/7.
3. “You just need to put yourself out there…”
While this may be sometimes true, what ever happened to mutual pursuit? The attraction people feel towards each other should be reciprocated. This statement provokes the idea that you should start chasing people until one of them responds to you. I’m not about that life. It’s fine to date and to find out what you like and what you don’t like, but the choice to do so should be yours. Don’t “put yourself out there” if you’re not ready. And someone as great as you deserves to have someone “put himself/herself out there” for you, too.
4. “Maybe you should make the first move.”
I’m actually a very shy person when it comes to this. While I personally DO NOT advise women to make the first move on a man, I understand if other guys/girls are nervous due to the possibility of rejection. But, anyway, here’s why I would not advise women to make the first move: I come from a VERY old-fashioned household. Whenever I heard stories about how my parents first met, I enjoyed hearing my dad’s various trials of pursuit for my mom. I can’t help but feel that if the relationship involves a man and a woman, that the man should work for the woman. There are too many things that women worry about that already involve men’s opinions.
5. “You’re too smart.”
JUST NO. I will not dumb myself down for anyone. Get on my level.
6. “You’re too independent.”
And you’re point is?… (followed by smirk/side-eye/fierce strut into the distance with high heels echoing. Okay, the last one doesn’t really happen, but I’ve been told that I have an authoritative walk).
7. “You’re just different.”
And you’re not? I actually like this statement, but it’s kind of a burn to the person who says it. At the same time, I hear this one a lot, and it’s making me wonder just how different I am.
8. “They’re so intimidated by you.”
But I’m only 4’9”…
9. “Maybe if you did something with your hair/makeup/clothes…”
NOPE. Whoever finds me will like me with my hair the way I like it, with or without any makeup (in most cases, no makeup), and with or without any clothes on.
10. “He/she is just shy.”
I get it, but this statement is soooooo overused it’s not funny.
11. “You’re just so different… culturally speaking.”
This is a great attribute, so do not say this in a negative tone. As a person of many colors (Caribbean, Indian, and Chinese), I get punched with this one a lot. And the reverse statement “You’re not different enough… culturally speaking” should also never be said. Everyone has a story. A person who’s worthwhile will accept your story.
12. “You just haven’t found your type yet.”
- I don’t have a type.
- Please do not tell me that you would turn down a gorgeous person because he/she does not have your “favorite” attributes. If you do, then SHAME ON YOU.
- Give people a chance! You never know what you may find…
Stay strong, loves! You are rare. Don’t ever forget that.
Images From: The prospect.net, Gifcrap.com, Lego.wikia.com, Wifflegif.com, Tinypic.com, Victorious.wikia.com, Commitmentto fitness.com, Survivingcollege.com, Deviantart.com