Funny / Life / News / Other News

Deez Nuts Is Allegedly In Search of a VP Candidate

I never in my 2+ decades of life thought I would be seriously typing out that headline, but here I am.

This is, in fact, real life.

For those of you who don’t know, “Deez Nuts” started out as a funny ass internet joke some months ago (but had been very popular, conversation-silencing phrase and tactic for years now).

However, it has now digivolved.

Yes, “Deez Nuts” has gone from a humorous phrase to a potential presidential candidate.

????

News broke of this startling development yesterday when it was discovered that “Deez Nuts” is “is polling at 9 percent in the latest PPP poll from North Carolina — after posting similar numbers in PPP polls of Minnesota (8 percent) and Iowa (7 percent)” (Rolling Stone).

Rolling Stone adds that “Deez Nuts” traces his origins back to Iowa and that he is actually a high school sophomore named Brady Olson.

Huh.

When I was a high school sophomore, I wasn’t even thinking about permanent careers much less running for president.

Good for you, Deez Nuts. Good for you.

Anywho, while his platform may be a bit thin for some, I for one am slightly impressed. Here’s the introducing quote on his platform:

Welcome to the official campaign website for Deez Nuts’ 2016 presidential run. On July 26th, 2015, Deez Nuts(I-IA) officially filed as a candidate for President. Almost immediately, our campaign started to generate substantial media buzz. The media attention might have gotten the word out, but now we need YOUR help to get on the ballot. Check out our platform to learn where Deez Nuts stands on the issues, or check out our ballot access page to see what needs to be done to see Deez Nuts on the ballot in 2016. If you are interested in helping with the campaign, contact us and ask us your questions. We will be happy to answer them. – Deez Nuts for President National Committee

I don’t know about you, but I’ve got vested interests in the “Rent Is Too Damn High Party”.

What? Don’t look at me like that.

That being said, that’s not the craziest thing to happen.

Just over an hour ago, film critic The Valerie Complex reached out to an account claiming to be affiliated with “Deez Nuts” and inquired about whether he is search for a vice presidential candidate:

“Deez Fillopian Tubes” and “Dat Uterus” sound like qualified candidates and would possibly lock-down all sorts of voting demographics.

All humour aside, while I’m cackling over how much attention this is getting, let this be a testament of how much of a joke some of the actual candidates are. The fact that “Deez Nuts” is even legitimately polling tells me that people aren’t exactly happy with the choices they have currently.

#sorrynotsorry for saying it

Will “Deez Nuts” be able to capitalize on this disgruntledness?

Will “Deez Nuts” join forces with “Deez Fillopian Tubes” or “Dat Uterus”?

Will “Deez Nuts be able to run away with the election?

Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z!

Images From: Michiganjournal.com, Twitter, ReactionGif.com, Tumblr, Freakoutnation.com

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