Meet AJ Parker

*Gasp* SECRET IDENTITY!!!!

Name: AJ Parker (or at least that’s what I tell you guys)

Occupation: Student…ing (it takes a lot more time than people think)

Panem District: 4 (what can I say? I’m aquatic)

Singer I can’t get enough of: Lana Del Rey (she just reminds of the 20s, even before Gatsby )

Star Trek Shirt color: Blue (I don’t particularly like dying, especially not first and yellow is doing WAY too much)

Marvel or DC: Marvel, sorry DC (with the exception of Batman…not the “Batnip” one, that was ALL bad)

Other: “One monkey doesn’t stop a show!”

Find me here: Facebook (friend me please, I have NO friends…I’m a loser), Email: ajparker@sublimezoo.com

*NEW!  All new categories and all new posts. Just go to ‘Random’ click on moi and check it out…or click here*

 

1. If you had to have an alter ego what would it be?
*Answers are courtesy of Lex Luther*

  • Hero: Kitty Pryde (X-men). “You’re definitely Kitty Pryde. Super sassy and funny, but also intelligent and heartfelt.”
  • Villain: Mash ups. “Mash-up between Mole-Man and Cruella De Vil with a dash of Maleficent. The Mole-Man from the end of The Incredibles (for the dramatacism), Cruella by extension. She is just A LOT more glamorous about her evilness. As for Maleficent, you can be very, VERY sinister when you want and need to be.”
  • Celebrity: Mash ups. “I say you’re a mash-up between Kelly Osbourne and Jennifer Lawrence. With a dash of Diva Beyoncé (not to be confused with Sasha Fierce) from her Diva Video, I say it’s the version of Beyoncé that is after hers and only hers and works hard for it.”

2. What/Who is your mortal enemy?

Juice. More specifically Orange Juice.
It is this most disgusting thing in the whole of life. It’s sour, it’s pulpy, and it came from a fruit (reason enough not to trust it). And then when you leave it alone for a while-which is what happens when you are a stubborn kid-all of the collective disgustingness decides to congeal and settle at the bottom making a visible layer and an ultra-turn off.
And if juice could have a henchman it would be everything that just happens to be “out of reach”. Coming from a (technically) “averaged height” female this is BS. And they generally serve the same purpose: to delay the sh*t out of you.
Plus, I like tea way more.

3. If you could have one superpower what could it be?

It would probably be Mind Control.
Imagine rolling around here like Professor X, it would be cool as hell. It would eliminate the need to actually do things for yourself. Let’s just say school would be without struggle.
In all seriousness, I most likely have a mild control over electricity or something like that, because for the past three months I have been shocking myself and other people nonstop, so much that they actively avoid touching me.

4. Favorite Pixar Movie?

Monster’s Inc., no contest.
And for like ten years I had unthinkingly made an entirely different plot to Finding Nemo that was neither the one they showed or made much sense.

5. If you were left with only one finger (no thumbs allowed) which would it be?

My pinky, ‘cause it’s sassy.

6. If the sorting hat from Harry Potter sorted you into a house right now, which would it be?

Slytherin, no doubt. In fact I took the test in Pottermore and that was the result.
I’m not “blah” enough -ok, hardworking (I totally avoid the stuff) – to be in Hufflepuff. I’m not an over-achieving, intelligent asshat, so Ravenclaw was a no. And I am nowhere near about the life of a Gryfindor. But I am a selfish ass-face that cares only for a select trustworthy few and they still come after numero uno (but they are a close second).

7. Who you would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?

I am going to assume we mean celebrities because I can.
Easy, Tom Hiddleston. Simply because the next 24 hours would not be boring.
He can do impersonations and he has “snake hips”.

8. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator?

…Freak The F*ck Out. “Save self at all costs” that’s the motto. And then when panic attack is over try pushing the emergency button, I guess.

9. You have just broken up with Taylor Swift and she promptly writes a song about you. What do you do?

Just as promptly proceed to beat her ass (assuming I get to keep my gender) I don’t condone seriously sinister violence but I would make an exception in this case.

10. If you had to have a Disney character (any character) represent your overall personality who would you choose?

Flynn Rider –okay *cough* Eugene Fitzherbert –from Tangled. Come on, he’s attractive…I’m attractive. Flynn is mildly full of himself and very self-centered yet there are a select few things that come before that. He is a thief and among my gaggle of siblings I’m am known for my ability to talk myself out of nearly anything with my mischievous trickery (and has the handy dandy can-slip-things-from-you-without-you-noticing-trait/pickpocketing).
And he is hilarious, delivering his dry humor that quickly offsets nearly all of the positive vibes that Rapunzel gives off. Just him saying stuff-in general- is enough to cause laughs (story of my life).
And…I can do the “smolder”, ask Lex.

 

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